Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

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A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Did you here about the man who dropped a glass? It broke.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

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There was an english man, and irishman and an pakistani sitting in a bar. What a wonderful example of racial & cultural differences bing put to one side while they are socialising in a friendly environment.

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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Whats the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have a Bar Mitzvah in Holocaust Germany.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops