What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

What is life? Paul.

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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