Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

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A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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The Sentence Below is True The Sentence Above is False

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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Where can you find elephants? That depends on where you leave them.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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What do you call said black man flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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