What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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The Labour Party.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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What would the world be like without 1 direction it would still be the world but just without 1 direction

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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