How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

What is the best way break up with your significant other without hurting their feelings? It is better to get it over with quickly and decisively. Gunshot to the head should do the trick.

chuck norris

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

The white guy did it!

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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