- Anti Joke

whos on the right track? lady gaga

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

roses are red violets are blue i have to poop

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a terrorist.

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

In the land of cheerios, there are three social classes. The bottom class consists of the regular cheerios, the middle class consists of the honey nut cheerios, and the top class consists of the frosted cheerios. One day, Mr. Cheerio was disappointed with his life in the bottom social class. He thought to himself, "Gosh, I bet life would be much better if I were a honey nut cheerio!" So he goes to the mighty cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must i do for thee that thou might make me a honey nut cheerio?" The great cheerio king then says to him "I shall make thee a honey nut cheerio if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of vegetables!". Mr. Cheerio accepts the quest and travels for many months and years through all of the neighboring lands and finally collects the vegetables. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the bargain my making him a honey nut cheerio. Mr. Cheerio is very happy with his new life. Due to his higher rank in society, he is able to find a wonderful job, marry a wonderful woman and have a few wonderful kids. One day, Mr. Cheerio thinks to himself, "I wonder what my life would be like if my family and I were all frosted cheerios. I could provide more for my family, and we would have a much fancier way of life!". He returns to the cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must I do for thee that thou might make my family and I frosted cheerios?". The king then states "I will make thee frosted cheerios if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of fruits." Mr. Cheerio accepts this new quest. He departs from his family and travels for many months and years through all the neighboring lands until he finds all the fruits he needs. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the deal by making Mr. Cheerio's family frosted cheerios. The life of the frosted cheerios is incredible. It is everything that the Cheerio family could have ever wanted. There are new opportunities around every corner. One day, a friend of Mr. Cheerio invites him to a dinner party that all of the frosted cheerios will be attending. Mr. Cheerio and his wife are talking to their friends at the party, when Mrs. Cheerio says to Mr. Cheerio, "Hey, honey, I'm getting a little thirsty. Could you go get me some punch?". Mr. Cheerio finds a very long line and stands in it. Once he gets to the front, however, he discovers that it is the line for steak, not punch. He repeats this process with half a dozen other lines, but he cannot find the line for punch. He returns to his wife and says, "Honey, there's something wrong with this joke. There's no punch line."

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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