What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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Where does a blind person drive a car? Into a tree.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.

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Who's worse: Ghandi or Hitler Answer: Hitler

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

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Which is longer? A rope...

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what does a squid and a worm have in commen they both are animals

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops