Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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Fart

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What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

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Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

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Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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why did the indian kill the buffalo? he was suffering from a psychological disorder and took to killing innocent animals in order to relieve the pent up rage caused by repressed memories of childhood abuse.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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