Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

thumb_up thumb_down -19

This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

pussy enough said

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

thumb_up thumb_down

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two girls are sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mom is fat

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops