I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? The sweet, merciful release of death at the hands of his father, who had been struggling with the emotional and financial drain of raising a severely disabled child for many years. It was only a matter of time before the man snapped, as he was a single parent working twenty hour days, seven days a week, to just barely cover all the medical bills that the specialists and therapy incurred.

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

when do you know your a BOSS................ when you get a promotion

A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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