How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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Justin Bieber.

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Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

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You were born.

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Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

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Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

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Blind people can't read this.

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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