Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

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"Want to hear a joke? Tough."

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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