In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

hi

how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

Jesse gets so many ladies

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

There were three men in a race: Crap, Manners, and Shut Up. During the race, Crap fell and Manners stopped to pick him up, Shut Up kept on speeding. The police stopped him. Here is there converstation: Police 1: Whats your name? Shut Up: Shut Up Police 2: Wheres your manners? Shut Up: Back there picking up crap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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