There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

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I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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