Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

thumb_up thumb_down -60

A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why don't you ever stick your hand into the bottom of the jelly bean jar? Cuz' the black ones will steal your watch

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

thumb_up thumb_down +5

One time at band camp.............that's it........

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops