What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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thomas hall= fuckin dikc

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What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to go to heaven because his girlfriend Margaret was cooked into chicken sandwhiches, and he had no kids and he didn't want to marry someone else, so he tried to get ran over but no cars hit him so he cooked himself. AND so he became KFC-Style chicken wings. BUUUT since no one ate them, he grabbed them up from heaven and commented on how delicious he was and proceeded to eat more and then exploded, sending him to heaven's heaven. But it was just a dream. And Margaret had to do laundry some more today because he freaking caused a urine tsunami. You're welcome.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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28

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops