Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

I like to eat people

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

1234 5

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

Derpy Hooves is retarded.

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

roses are red, vilots are blue wan't you in my bed if you know what i mean ;)

What's worse then the Boston bombing? The Texas bombing, considering Texas is a much bigger region then Boston.

What did the mentally retarted student get on his SAT? Drool

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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