Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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What's funnier than poop? More poop

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

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I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

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Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

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A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

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Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

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Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

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Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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