What looks like Micheal Jackson but isn't Micheal Jackson A black guy

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

If olive oil is made from olives and vegetable oil from vegetables, what is baby oil made of? Mineral Oil, Aloe Vera Extract, Vitamin E, Acetate, Fragrance.

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

whats funny? laughing at people when they die a slow and painful death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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