What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

If you give a homeless man a fish he eats for the night, if you teach him to fish then he probably won't be able to feed himself anyway, he is too poor to afford a pole.

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

How old are you? 7

Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

WHAT DO U CALL GINGERS GABRIELLA

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

Child Prostitution.

What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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