What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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One dark, stormy night, there was a man, limping slowly down the road. He looked across the road and noticed a little girl on a park bench. He carefully moved around behind , creeped up, and slowly tapped her on the shoulder. I tap 2 tap 3 tap The little girl slowly turned her head, and as she did, the man uttered 3 sentences.... "Would you mind helping me get back to my apartment, my hand was cut off in the war, while I was serving my country, which is why I have a hook as opposed to a hand. I was heading back to my apartment to greet my wife and 2 little children, since I just got back from a long day's work at the soup kitchen, helping those in need, and I sprained my ankle. By the way, my name I John Thompson."

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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Runescape.

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9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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how do you make my dad say oww? throw a baseball bat at him.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Patient: "Doctor I think I might be a homosexual." Doctor: "How can you tell?" Patient: "RAAIIINNBOOOOWW!!!"

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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Does anyone know any good ways to piss off an Grammar Nazi?

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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