What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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there are two kinds of people in this world: those who like anit jokes and those who don't

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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so i walk into a bar the bartender says what do you want i say a beer please he then goes one dear coming up soi thought tomy self should i tell him what i really said so i let him get the dear but for some reason he came out with tears i asked whats a matter he said you let me go to kill a dear

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Miley Cyrus.

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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