A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

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Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

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If a man is alone in the woods and there is no one there to tell he's wrong is he right? If a tree falls on a women.... Before we tell the rest why was there a tree I the kitchen?

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

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GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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A black guy and a mexican guy are falling from a building. Which one hits the ground first? Who cares

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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