Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well...here's how it went. It was a rainy Sunday evening. Seven felt like he wasn't cared for and unneeded. Two and Four tried talking to him, but that might have set him off. I just left a deli with my friend Three, and as soon as we leave, I see Seven, with a 45 to his head speeding down the alley. Causing mass commotion, he careens to the right a split second before hitting pedestrians. At the sight of that, I knew he was still in control. I call him on my smartphone and tell him to "Relax, park, and I'll meet you in a minute." I run up the side of the pickup, and lean in on the window. He pulls it down and I tell him that it isn't over, and that we DO care for him. One, Five, and Ten were run over though. Oh, and Seven ate Nine too. He was depressed when he did it.

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

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What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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