One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

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What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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FUCK THE CHRISTIANS

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Knock Knock? Who's there? bob bob who? the builder

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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An asian walks out of math class

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

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Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

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What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door.

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Why couldn't little Jimmy see his mum in the crowd? Because he was blind.

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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knock knock who's th...AIDS.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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