a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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Spinabifita

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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A bar walks into your mother.

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Knock, Knock. Come In.

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How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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a fish swimming in the water swims

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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