Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Did you hear about the deaf kid? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What does? 42

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

thumb_up thumb_down

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

thumb_up thumb_down

what is worse than a guy pissed?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's white and black? Color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops