Q: What is the differenc between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babys? A: I dont have a lamborghini my garage.

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

Q: What did Albert Einstein say to Adolf Hitler? A: They never talked. And if Albert Einstein did say something to Adolf Hitler, he would have died first.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

Josh kissing a girl

speak now or forever hold your pee

What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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