How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

An Englishman walks into a bar.

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

A black guy walks into a basketball court.

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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