how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Gay rights.

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Joesph Triphook.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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mental kid

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This is an anti-joke.

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How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

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What happened to the man who fell off a cliff? He fell

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

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You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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