What do you get when you cross the color pink and pie? A penis ate the answer.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Conversation: Hey dawg? Whats that? Hey, remember curiosity killed the cat! You threatening me on my life and calling me a pussy? Im calling the cops. ...Because like Larsons some of my ideas suck, but since I am an asshole I also add them to fill some space.

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What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Life gave me limes. Now how am I suppose to make lemonade

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

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Where did John go? Refrigerator

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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