Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Getting aids from that apple.

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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your all shit at jokes

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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A man breaks into your house points a gun at your head and proceeds to fire a blank... The man stares at your for another minute before jumping back out of the window he crawled in from and sitting on the curb outside your house rethinking his life choices.

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whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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