Wanna know something fishy? A fish

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

why did the mexican stab those people? why? he didn't you racist

Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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