Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

poop.........

if your in a wheelchair have no hair because of cancer and are being fed through a tube you should wait a couple of years before ending it. and wrinkles into the equation....... BANG

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

Knock Knock! Who's there? What do you mean... we have been having a conversation for a half hour now... that's your name you idiot, Knock Knock!

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

Why would you ever buy an antijoke book? BECAUSE ANTIJOKES ARE F***ING AWESOME!!!

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

Why does Santa Clause not have children? Because he only "comes" once a year

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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