Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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Jeff

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

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"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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