Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus? He got hit by a bus and died.

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Guy 1: "Hey do you want to hear a joke?" Guy 2: "Sure" Guy 1: "No."

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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Quick ladies take off all your clothes the cloth stealer is coming Oh yyyaaaa

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How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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poop

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Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

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It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

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YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

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Pope: how to help the unfortunate people my fellow Christians? Christians: We should give donations and a lot of support. What we always do. Pope: and i shall wear this golden hat, sit on a high quality super expensive chair, this rope with gold attached to the decorations, and wave my golden staff as you help these poor innocent children. Christians: yes...that... Pope: P.S: and live in an expensive church with many children alone.

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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You wanna hear a joke? Me too

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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