It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

thumb_up thumb_down +4

That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you have a great time in a college town you don't

thumb_up thumb_down

Butt Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +12

teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops