A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

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What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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Why the boy doesn't get any birthday presents? he has cancer.

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

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What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

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are u black unlucky

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What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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