Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

alcoholism kills

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is large, heavy, tastes like poptarts, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A semi truck full of poptarts

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

sky's sty

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

thumb_up thumb_down

"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops