Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

Luke Hardie is G@Y

Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

What did the fish say when it was being fried? That's crazy, fish can't talk.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

You smell like shit

guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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