Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

Whats the difference between a polish drunkard and a German scholar? They are two different nationalities.

all your base are belong to mark

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

whats the difference between a black man and a bench a bench can support a family

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

my shift key is broken1

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...