Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

Worms don't like apples.

Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

I am a nigger.

What do you call an African American witch doctor dressed in ceremonial robes flying a plane? A Pilot.

What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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