Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Obama

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Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

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You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

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Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

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What's the difference between 6th graders and Jews? 6th graders make it back from camp. :)

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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