How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

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A man was driving in his BMW one day when a mini passed him out on the fast lane. The BMW driver thought 'i can't have that!' so he sped up and overtook the mini. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention and he drove into the back of a school bus. Ironically the bus contained the mini driver's 3 daughters, he was driving so fast because they had forgotten to bring their lunch and he was trying to catch up with the bus so he could give them their sandwiches. There were no survivors of the crash, except for the mini driver.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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What do you call 17 blondes standing in a row? most certainly not Charles because it seems as though it would be incrediblely unlikley that a girl would be named Charles

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

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Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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What do you call a black astronaut? An astronaut you racist

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Hahaha

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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