What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

69 is a number not a sex poshion

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

sixty....eight.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man was having problems with his computer, so he called customer service. An Indian man, by the name of Muhammad picked up the phone. This came of no surprise to the man, because Muhammad is the most common name in the world. The man soon found and fixed the problem on his computer and hung up.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What hurts more than a bullet? A bullet penetrating your skin, muscle and embedding itself in your body

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops