Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

I love you very much.

knock knock whose there open the door open the door who just open the door so i can come inside

How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...