An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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I don't know about anybody else, but I just watched a part of a My Little Pony episode, and there's something about them that makes you want to come back and watch more. It's wierd, like mind control. Has anyone noticed this?

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snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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Two families of pedophiles go to the beach. One of the dads lays down to suntan and looks at the other dad. "Hey! Get out of my son!" he exclaims.

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Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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why did the young teenage boy E J A C U L A T E? because he saw his sexy dad shirtless.

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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Guy walks into a bar and half his head is an orange. Barman: What can i get.. holy shit half your head is an orange!! How did that happen?? Guy: Magic Lamp, rubbed it, three wishes etc etc. Barman: What in the bejesus were your three wishes, half your head is an orange. Guy: First Wish – I wished for every woman in the world to love me. Barman: Right, that is ok. What was your second wish? Guy: Second Wish – I wished that I was a billionaire. Barman: What in the hell was your third wish half your head is a frickin orange? Guy: It was a silly wish. I dot wanna say: Barman: Go on tell me, I’ll give you a drink. Guy: OK well for my third wish I wished that half my head was an orange.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile robin.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Why couldn't the mute kid tell his mom the house was on fire? Casue he fell down the stairs and broke his hands...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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