What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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Busted? What the hell is going on?

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What did the Republican say after he got off the ferris wheel but before he went on the roller coaster? "Boy, that ferris wheel sure was fun! Now I will ride the roller coaster!"

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Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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i love huge wieners.

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Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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