whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

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what do you call a drunk person? By his or her name and call him a cab

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What did Spiderman do when he saw a crime taking place? He stopped it

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When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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Turkey Balls

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What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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What's big, grey and can't climb trees? A carpark.

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

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How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

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diarrhea, diarrhea, duh duh diarrhea, I flush someone down the potty with my diarrhea Duh, duh diarrhea I want to marry my diarrhea duh duh diarrhea. Written by Niggalyncha666

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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