What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

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Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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AVI IS A FAG

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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What do you call a deaf black man? Well, if you did not already know his name, you would first have to contact a member of his family, or a friend, and ask them, as even if you were able to communicate the question of 'what is your name?' to the man, it is well known that the speech of deaf people is nowhere near as clear as that of people who are able to hear.

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What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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