Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

How do you make your house smell bad? fart

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

woman's rights

Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

Denard Robinson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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