Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

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Bob and Joe are talking about how their grandfathers died in the Hulacaust. Bob says "Mine died in the gas chambers" Joe says "Mine got drunk and fell off the guard tower.

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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c:

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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