If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

thumb_up thumb_down

What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Once there was a girl named Andrea

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the fridge say when I opened it? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops