Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

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41

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

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why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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