how do you spell ugly ? U G L Y.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do we bother living when someday we will die? To reproduce and watch TV.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

your mums so fat that shes HUGE!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

thumb_up thumb_down +170

Why do black people drink cool-aid? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

thumb_up thumb_down +7

2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops