Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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What's worse than the front page of anti-joke.com? The 4945th page of anti-joke.com, as those jokes have been rated poorly by other users.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Choir.

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Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

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Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

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Knock knock What

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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