why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven liked to eat numbers lower than itself.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

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Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

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Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

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Wanna hear an anti-joke?

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Anthony sucks

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Women's Rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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