Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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what's up? my penis.

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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