Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

A blind man sits down to read Anti jokes Whoops my bad

A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance cocvered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being deined coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be covered." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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