Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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what do you call a black guy in a house? a burglar

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A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

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space is fun

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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these are shit

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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Is J.P. dumb? Yes

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A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

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Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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