What did the circle say to the square? Ur a square

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

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A dirty joke Three white horse's are walking down a trail one falls in the mud

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What's the difference between a Jewish child and pizza? Pizza does not scream in the oven.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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A sober Irish individual.

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What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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why did the chair brake? because a car smashed into it. where did it go? all the way to china. whats 3+4? why did the Chinese man get this wrong? Because a chair was in his head.

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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