what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody actually knows this because the chicken could not tell us why he/she crossed the road so it would be nearly impossible to get the answer.

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven. Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

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What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops