whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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fava beans

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

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What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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