what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

Knock Knock? Come in.

A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

What did Mr. Sandman do whrn the boy asked for one too many dreams, nothing because Mr. Sandman was the boys bitch.

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

Nickelback ranked number 1 as greatest rock band according to rolling stones magazine!

What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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