How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What did one computer say to the other? 01001111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011 0100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 0100000 01101001 01110011 0100000 01101111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011

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Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

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What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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America Votes

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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