What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Obama.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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