What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch

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"Oi Tom" "What Tom?" "What did Tom say to Tom?" He was talking to himself Such a bad anti-joke

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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why do fat people eat so much? who cares

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

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What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

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black people are white when i use night gogles

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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what do you call a sick eagle illegal

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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The Pope

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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