How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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