Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

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What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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