What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

Knock Knock Come in! :)

:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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