What did the black kid get for Christmas? Nothing. He celebrates Kwanzaa.

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Don't think of granny porn

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

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What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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how did the kenyan get away from the cup He didnt he got arrested

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This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

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What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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