Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than a papercut? Dying

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

who drinks pee? katness

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How did the black kid drop out of highschool? He got bad grades.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Just two animals that are judged.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do canadians have a lower violent crime rate than the U.S? Because they were all raped as children and are now afraid of getting raped again when bathing in prision.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops