a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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Shape like a book, have papers like a book, have a cover like a book, and could be read like a book. But it's not a book, what is it? A dictionary

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whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

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Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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the nintendo 3ds is being released this week. its the first 3d portable gaming device that doesnt require glasses, also known as a ball...

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The cow went moo

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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