Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Your existance.

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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Soccer...

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A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

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a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says, "I'm Japanese!" The second man says, "I'm Japanese too!" The bartender says, "I'm also Japanese!" The bar was in Japan.

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? One, unless she's too short, in which case she may get someone else to do it for her.

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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Hey

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Stop being a centipede

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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