Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

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I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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How do you make your house smell bad? fart

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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