knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

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Q: what is man without a beard A:not a man

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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HITLER IS SO SEXY I WOULD PAY A MILLION DOLLARS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIS DEAD HOT BODY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM I SPRAY MY SEMEN ALL OVER MY JEWISH SLAVES YUMMY HITLER JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BITE HIS ROTTING PENIS OFF AND FORCE IT IN THE EYE SOCKET OF A JEWISH PERSON AND THEN I CUM IN HIS EYESOCKET

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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