Knock Knock WHO'S THERE?????!!! y u mad? u have been knocking at the doors for 5 hours now, mom

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In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kidnap his family.

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Cliterus

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than that? Two dead babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than that? Two dead trees naild to a baby.

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i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

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Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

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What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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