What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

I love it when i go into my classroom first thing in the morning, and the light are off... i always feel so Empowered... i walk in, and say Let There Be Light! while i lift my arms up and there was light.... omg! im god! O_O

I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

Roses are red, bikers are blur.....I love you ( drunk texting )

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

one stop shop

Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

Why was the fat person sad? Because he was fat.

What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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