Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Q:Whats worst then finding a worm in your apple? A:Getting raped in the ass.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

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GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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