I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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what's black and has a huge sac? A negro

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

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An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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