Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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Basically

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I completely thought you where bullshitting me, how come I never noticed before? How and why?

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Why did the...uhh.... Lamp.

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. unless you're color blind...

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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What happened to the man that jump out of the airplane with no parachute? He landed on a baby and both died almost instantly. The authorities were called and they took care of the situation flawlessly.

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A moose walks into a grocery store. It goes up to the clerk and asks, "do you guys have any potatoes?" the clerk replies oh yeah they're in isle... Ooooh wait a second. You're a moose. The moose responds, "Yes, indeed I am." The clerk then says "Oh ok, isle seven."

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What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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Why does the gaming console Wii suck? ????????????????I like ice cream????????????????

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Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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Asians

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Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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