Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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willie revilame

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Invisible Television.

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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