A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

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The child was fired from his job.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

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whats round and like a ball a ball

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Kim Kardashian.

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http://www.ladsta.com

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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Unless you yourself put you trough that pain and misery, you have no reason to dislike or flee from who you are.

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A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

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Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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