Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

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Justin Beiber

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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So a seal walks into a club.

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How many men do you have to have sex with to show that you're gay? But, I'm a woman!

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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