What is the difference in a crow. There is none. Both legs are of equal length.

thumb_up thumb_down -155

Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

World peace

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's worse than the holocaust living jews

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock Who's there? Tom Tom who? Tom Rodgers I don't know you Tom decides to leave the house because the person in the house does not recognize him

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops