Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

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what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Josh Hamilton walks into a bar.

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

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i feel like i will die some heroic death, but its more likely i will trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

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How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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