how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

lebron

What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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