poop

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Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

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A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

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What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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what did the black mother think of her daghter's white boyfreind? i dont know i cant read minds

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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