how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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Why did Johnny's pants fall down? Because he was fat.

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree ... Because it was dead

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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What's the difference between a whale and an elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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