What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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How do you get a one-armed kid down from a tree? Wave.

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What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

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Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kidnap his family.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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Knock knock Who's there? (Punch the listner in the face)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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