An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

Q. What's smarter then the smartest woman in the world? A. A retarded seal, or pretty much anything else.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've tested positive for herpes We probably shouldn't have intercourse

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

my captcha says : forkin chickens

Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

Josh Brown loved coressing his mums doodle at night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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