Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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Why did the boy fall out of his high chair? I'm not sure.

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i have two hands.

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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Why did Larry the Cable Guy say "Git R Dun"? Because he thought it was funny, and so did a bunch of other people for some reason.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

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Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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