What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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Why are you angry dude? I can't see my forehead

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk...

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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Pull my finger ouch..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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