your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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There once was this guy and he fell down

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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whats the difference between a mexican and a fish? one is a human being while the other is a fish, what did you expect?

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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Q. What is the difference between Jesus and and a picture of Jesus? A. It takes one nail to hang the picture Not trying to offend anyone just a joke to be clear

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Nock nock Whos there? The mailman, I have a package for you. Thank you.

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So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

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Women's rights

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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