a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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There was a white man who sat on a log. then suddenly a Chinese man popped out and said he had to leave. he left.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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Grammer is very important

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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