how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Q: Whats worst then losing your wallet? A: Giving birth to a dead baby.

What do you call a boy with one eye and no arms. -Mean names.

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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