Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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Q: what do you call a man that see's a unicorn A: hallucinating

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Whats worse than jizzing while your on a date? Shitting in you pants while your on a date.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

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You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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cot!

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why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

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God has put a gate keeper at a gate in heaven to listen to how everyone has died. The first guy comes and says, "I thought my wife was cheating on me so when i came home I see this man hanging off my balcony, I thought he was the man cheating with my wife, so I then push him off, but he was still alive, so I threw a refrigerator onto him, that killed him, but I felt so guilty I soon commited suicide" The gates man said, "Wow thats terrible come in." Then the next guy come and he says how he died, "Well you see I was just oiling myself up for my workout, but I slipped, and fell off my 5th story balcony, and landed in some guys 3rd floor balcony I was hanging off the ledge, and a guy came I thought he was going to help me, but instead he pushed me of and threw a refrigerator on me." The guard let him in, and a third guy came. The Guard said,"Man its going to be hard to beat those guys their just sad. Ok how did you die?" The third man said, "Picture this I'm trapped in a refrigerator...

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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