Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

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What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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