so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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