Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because they can shoot steal and run and they keep brass knuckles in there waste band.

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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What do andy and Justin Bieber have in common? they are both 5'7

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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why do black people like to play basketball steal shoot and run

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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your mom is so fat she died of brain cancer

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Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

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whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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