Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What happened to the white girl who dropped her ice cream? She bought another one.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

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Four black guys have a picnic. One of them pulls out a bag of KFC. Another pulls out some Kool Aid. The third pulls out a watermelon. The fourth pulls out a box of cookies you racist prick

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Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

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Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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