Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

soccor

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What's the difference between anti jokes and Charlie Sheen? Nothing. Their both stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

thumb_up thumb_down +8

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=148&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=L4yN-90F2S2nXM:&imgrefurl=http://www.britishbeautyblogger.com/2012/05/justin-bieber-nails.html&docid=yYdBShdYVODKdM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YFyj_mKUypY/T6VP6iGQeCI/AAAAAAAAJjI/y6cpVYjn9Gs/s1600/harry.PNG&w=573&h=413&ei=ZY7HT_XqHo2c8QStiY2IDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=724&vpy=140&dur=435&hovh=191&hovw=265&tx=75&ty=135&sig=110416686013590693091&page=12&tbnh=148&tbnw=229&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:148,i:142

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

thumb_up thumb_down -27

whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down +439

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did the boy die in the holocaust? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops