how do you make a plumber cry you kill his family

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

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Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

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mooooh im a cow

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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Canada's army

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Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

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A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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Q: What's worse than one dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? A: One dead baby in ten trash cans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops