Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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A man walks into a bar Ouch!

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

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What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

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Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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Domonic is a gay homo!!!!!!!!!!!! Vagina

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? cause 789! no, not anymore, didn't you hear? 6 and 9 got together last night and 8 eachother.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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