What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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want to go home? yea

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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Obama getting elected in 2012.

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What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Why is Justin Bieber better than Freddie Mercury? Freddie Mercury is dead. Justin Bieber is still alive. Also Freddie Mercury is ugly and Justin is hot.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops