what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

what's 2 + 2? i don't know that's why i'm asking you

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

What's long and black The unemployment line

What Did Charles Manson Do For a Klondike Bar? He Bought One

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

Why did the teenager commit suicide? Because he was constantly being bullied in school, which caused him to be depressed. Days later he found out that his mother had breast cancer and was most likely not going to survive.

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

someone called a frog a frog

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

-Knock knock -Come on in!

Why was the duck in jail? For Smoking...Quack!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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