A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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you wanna hear a joke? no

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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Why did the hockey cross the road? To get to KFC.

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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Barack Obama

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

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Why did Janelle fail her math test? Because she didn't study.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

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Q

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Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

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Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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