what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure and drugs.

How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

Why was the black man so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

read this

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

lol

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...