John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

Q: What did Jenna Jameson say when she heard hard banging near the front door? A: Come inside

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

What do you have if you have 100 rabbits in a row and 99 step back? That would be a very unlikely thing to happen, unless a mildly scary predator was released in front of them, or they weren't all stepping back at the same time.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

what do you call a professional gamer Their name

A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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