What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

NASCAR

Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

why does the guy jack off to black on black porn? because he's black

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

Why do people like vacations? To get out of your family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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