When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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A hispanic priest with a huge boner walks into a bar.

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

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The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What do Kim Kardashian and a broken-down horse have in common? They will both eat oats out of your hand.

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Tell you something funny.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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This Anti-Joke Is Loading Plese Wait . . .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Worlds first anti joke.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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Knock knock Who's there ... Hello? Is there anyone there? (In the bushes) Ha! He'll never suspect us!

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? One is a tasty Italian food the other is a respected member of society

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What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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