Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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A man walks into a bar.

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Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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This joke is funny

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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The homeless man first experience warmth....in Hell

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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