A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

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My spelling is horrible

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

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Women's football

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

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Your mom is so fat that she actually had a pretty hard time finding a husband.

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Probably just one.

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and chickens are from a different phylum, they are genetically incompatible.

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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your momma's so stupid she shot herself

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What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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