Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "It sure is hot in here". The other muffin says, "Yeah like 350, 375".

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. Bars serve people of all religions.

Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

Is your refrigerator running. Yes. Good, then I don't need to call an electrician.

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

Your mom is so fat that she actually had a pretty hard time finding a husband.

Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the fence open, so it wandered around and happened to cross a road.

What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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