What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

I am a real homosexual

What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

i hate you.

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

What happened to the woman who was raped? She was mentally scarred for life and finds it hard to trust men.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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