Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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Testicles.

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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equality for women

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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A jew enters a mall.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

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maddie latino

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A blonde walks into a bar... ...she got rufeed.

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Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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