Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

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Gorden Brown.

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So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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