roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

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What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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There was a little boy (Jewish edition) Saten: Look father, my silk vestments make me look so much more fabulous than you! Gad: Oh! Hawt sweetie! But not as pretty as my dress... Err I mean "silks"... Anyway you are no longer my son! Which means we can do you know what ;) Saten: Hmpf! I am feel disappoint in of your dress! Gad: ITS SILKS! just *basically* a dress... Oh my gawd! You refuse to give it to your "daddy" ;) You are losar ant not gonna get to hang around this club anymore! Saten: OMFG you are so enrage! You are liek not classy or flamboyant at all anymore, sorry pimp "daddy" :/ Imma leavin! And btw Adam my secret lover has such a bigger wienersnitzel anyways, and he is totally eating my fruits if you know what I mean ;) Gad: Oh me so jelez I am completelay going to panish him! I am throwing him out of Paradise and he will only be abley to get children with women now, lulz I am liek so evel. Saten: OMG WEMEN! UR LIEK ZO EVEL! What u goin to do next huh? Forbid Sodomy? Omg tat would be so mean :(... Moral: "NEVER WEAR A FINER SILKS THAN GAD!"...Well, it starts with two flamboyant faggots fighting over who has the "prettiest silk vestments" (basically dresses)... The rest kinda kinda figures.

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

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Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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