Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Roses are red violet are blue i saw a machine and it was ps2

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How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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What do you call a gathering of Asians? A chinkfest

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why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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Female Orgasms

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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What did the Homosexual say to the Southern American? I'm A Homosexual. What did the Southern American say back? I Respect That.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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