When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

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why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first baby. Why did the third baby fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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a man walked into a bar....

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why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

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a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

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Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What is small, naked and covered in sperm My son

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why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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