numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

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JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

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What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

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hi my name is? joe

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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