What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Hey, you pee here? Yes, it's called a urinal

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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i Have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

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What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

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Whats worse than an old guy? An old woman!

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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Do you play piano? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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