Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

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Roses are wilting violets are wilting YOU HAD ONE JOB

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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No, we are all different, none of us are the same, you however, have no match, your ability to think influence and inspire even today, is unmatched. It is he who is unmatched, who stands alone.

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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