text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the old man keep the kids off his lawn? By molesting their Moms.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what smells like tuna? my underwear

thumb_up thumb_down -44

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops