Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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alcoholism kills

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

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Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

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Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

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WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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