Penis.

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

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So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

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a man and a boy walk into a dark scary wood. "gosh I'm spooked" exclaimed the boy. "you think you've got it bad?" said the man "I'm walking out of here alone"

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

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Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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Why didn't the woman go to the kitchen? She was kidnapped and forced into sex-slavery

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knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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