One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

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Call of Duty is a good game.

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What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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i was raised in a bad family. i was the youngest and i was abused then i died three years back. then i died again and then i died again then i died again then again then i LIVED but then i died again then i died again then i died again then i died again

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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