what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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Why was the blonde in the library? Because she was committed to her studies and was getting ready for a test.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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Weed.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

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Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

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Knock Knock! Who's there? So. So who? Cares.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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hickory dickory dock no one cares

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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