Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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Hitler had the right ideas, wne tupon it the wrong way.

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

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If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

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what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

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A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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