How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

People say it's easy to make fun of retarded people. But it's really not. You always have to explain it to them.

wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

Omg you bought a Prius? Children in Africa are starving and could have used that money to buy food.

What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

im jewish

How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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