Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs. A pharmisict.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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Knock-Knock The man wasn't home, so there was no answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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