Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Nobody likes you.

Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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