A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten won the contest. The man didn't think much of it.

Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, which happens to be holding a support group for dyslexic people tonight. The name of the bar and all patrons are palindromes to avoid confusion.

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

Shit.

An Asian child flunks a test.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

I'm growing tired of all those ADD jokes. I have ADD, and I... ... what time is it?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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