A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

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What does the gay man do while he is taking a shower with many other men in a prison or a gym? Lathers soap all over his body to clean himself so he is not smelly.

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

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What did the devil say to the baby with four arms? I am evil.

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knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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No.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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