List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

heyy emit chase wazzup

There's now a sandwich named after Jerry Sandusky, it's got 60 year old meat stuffed between buns barely out of the oven.

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

Your Mom

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

Please? No.

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he needed to get to the store across the street.

what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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