Why do British Folk have yellow teeth? Genetics. Although scientists don't know the exact cause, it has been shown that people of British ancestory have a genetic predisposition which inhibits the body's breakdown and utilization of Vitamin C and Calcium. This causes decalcification and scorbutic gums. The British slang term "Limey" comes from the fact that the British Royal Navy was made to drink lime juice to prevent scury. The Royal Navy was almost wiped out by an epidemic of Scurvy.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

That awkward moment when you wonder why this person keeps stepping on you, and you realize that you’re a shoe.

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

dyslexia is like gingervitus except they are exactly alike in possible little ways with gigantic raging boners CC

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

Mmmmmmm Lemons

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

What's worse than reading the same joke multiple times? Having cancer.

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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