Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Do you know what they say? Words

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the chicken cross the road? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

thumb_up thumb_down

whats black and blue and has three legs? An abused deformed person.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the chicken cross the road? -----it didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do black people suck? Because they're black

thumb_up thumb_down -6

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Should a pole bump an alarm?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops