What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

What is yellow and can shot? A Banon.

I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

Your social life.

What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

Harry Styles

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

Make little things count Teach midgets math

How do 5 gay teenagers walk? In 'One Direction"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

denisssssssssssssss

Two black men walk into a strip club. They immediately walk out because they have faithful wives at home nurturing their beautiful African children.

orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

Why are white people afraid of black people? The holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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