What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Your momma is so old, it's just irresponsible of her not to have regular doctor appointments. Health should always come first.

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When is a door not a door? Never.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I'm not quite sure. I only took one year of Japanese in high school.

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What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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osama bin laden is dead

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Q:Why did the black man break into the KFC? A: Due to being recently fired from his job, he is not earning any income. The lack of money to support his family of 5 drove him to such a desperate state that he found breaking into restaurant the only way to provide for his loved ones.

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whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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