how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

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A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

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Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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