There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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there was a tomatoes and it blew up and died. Why did it blow up? The Nazi's needed ketchup for there Jew Burgers

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Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

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An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

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What's the difference between katchup and musterd A very long list of things that I don't want to read

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

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my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

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Did you know that there is no A is "sodimizing"?

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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