Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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You might be a redneck. Sorry.

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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a skinny sumo wrestler

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

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Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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