A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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women's rights

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why does the man appear fat he is

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Mitt Romney for president.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Hey, we're both lawyers.

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Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

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Why did the mother have an abortion? Because she thought it would best financially for her current family.

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A man decided to enter the local pun contest. He sent in ten puns. One of them was very witty and he won the contest and felt very good about himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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