What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? After looking both ways many times, repeatedly, to make sure there was absolutely no element of possible danger, he concluded that his best option was the cross the road.

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A handicapp walks into a bar

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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A Russian who dosen't like vodka

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i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

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I like Pi. It can make circles.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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can you pass the soap?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

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Who is the fattest mexican on the earth? Not Osama because he's dead...and he wasn't mexican..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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