a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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A black guy WALKS out of prison.

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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I have a dirty joke. Poop.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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