What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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why did the mexican slave have cuts and bruises all over her. She fell off her skateboard... Another joke by rangler. thumbs up for more.

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What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

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Hitler was Jewish.

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Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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Creepy Man: Let's play the rape game Young Girl: No!!!! Creepy Man: That's the spirit

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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A white guy, a black guy, and a Spanish guy jump off of a building. Due to acceleration of gravity, they hit the ground at a fast speed and die.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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One guy asks another guy, "Why did the sleeping man get sucked into the sinkhole?" The other guy replies, "I don't know, I heard about that a few months ago, it seems highly improbable statistically. "

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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