What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

One terrible stormy night, the citizens of Ristoville were hiding from the monsterous lightning cloud approaching them. Little Jonny Harrison, however, was not afraid. This boy had been bullied from the ripe young age of about 14 months by his closest friend, Uncle Oliver, who happens to be a Catholic Priest. Jonny wanted to face the storm, with 6 years behind him, he thought it bizzare that anything worse than Uncle Oliver's magical basement could be brought unto him. He grabbed his supply of Cheese and Onion Quavers, a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Flavoured Ribena, his pretend mobile, a 10ft long metal conductor and his pet grape, "Christopher", and set out for the journey of his life. He told his terminally ill mother that he is going for the adventure of a lifetime, his dad that he wishes him well, and finally, his Grandmother, Rosie Harrison, who has had a severe addiction to meth for almost 25 years now, who has had over 13 interventions and countless attempts at suicide, that he loves her with all of his strong, brave heart, and to hang in there. Little Jonny Harrison takes his first step outside, facing the eye of storm with a little bit of pee in his pants, squeezes his Ribena, slightly squirting it and throwing it heroicly to the drooping wet grass, and screams to the cloud, at the top of his lungs, the words, "I am unstoppable!". Jonny died of HIV induced AIDS and his Uncle was given three to five years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation and consistent domestic abuse and paedophillia. His Grandmother, Rosie, also died later that day.

Q: A squirrel a chipmunk and a spider monkey are fighting over these nuts. Who gets them? A: Your Mom ;p

Four men were walking, and three of them walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

Why did paul macartny have plastic surgery? Because he wasn't happy with the looked

Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? We are both therapists

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

why wouldn't the printer work? because there was an animal in it.

i feel like i will die some heroic death, but its more likely i will trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

GAWS SI EKOJITNA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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