I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

thumb_up thumb_down +2

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A black guy WALKS out of prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you call a half dead black person crawling across your lawn..............................stop laughing and reload

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops