A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

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What's one plus one? two.

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roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Hi.

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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