Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

gay people

A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

HARRY EFFING STYLES

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

pineapples

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

A woman was at a family reunion and her husband's mother walked in. She has a chocolate allergy so the woman says the her husband,"I need more chocolate!"

Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

why is this joke funny because your laughing

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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