whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Johnny woke up christmas morning, went downstairs and opened his presents to find he had an iPhone, iPad,Ps3 Laptop, the full lot. Then his mate came around and Johnny bragged about all the stuff he had got. Then his mate replied," I wish i had cancer".

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's similar about a mole and an eagle? They both are blind and dig through the ground. Except the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

thumb_up thumb_down -3

One time I walked into a fat kid..

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The queen having a shit

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't Suzie go to the park? She commited suicide 2 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops