The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

7

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

An Artic Storm.

how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

How old are you? 7

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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