How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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What do Mitt Romney and Barak Obama have in common? Nothing that is why they are running against each other for US President.

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Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

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AND

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are....

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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ekoj

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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