How does shit taste?\ Good.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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– Hello. Is this a laundry? – Yes, it is a laundry.

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A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

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Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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What is 17 meters, squared? A square.

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Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

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A gay man walks down a street before being stabbed to death by a homophobe.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

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Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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