This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

knock knock? come in

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

Knock Knock. Who's there? .

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

To mama so old, she might die soon.

Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

feminine literature

the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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