Knock Knock, Who's Theres? Your dead squashed nan

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Q: What do you call four black guys hanging in a barn? A: Farm tools

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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You know what's interesting about Polish people? Nothing.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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