What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

troll----> hahaha---->

Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

What's worse than death? Nothing.

Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's dad? Neither did she

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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