Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

yo mama's so fat!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

thumb_up thumb_down -18

luke moore cant pull it back

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Find the I in the iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIiIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops