What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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What happend to the murderer who ate people? He was sent to jail for a number of years and now is having work done to stop him from eating people

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

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What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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What is red? A rock painted red

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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