Why couldn't the elephant ride a bike? Because he had no thumbs...

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know where i was going with this one.... Refrigerator

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...