A scotsmen, an Irishman and an Englishman all walk into a bar. The publican had accidentally left the door unlocked and the bar was in fact closed. So they left.

What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

25

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

German sausage is the wurst

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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