187

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One scientist is talking to another scientist. One say "what's the matter?" The other replies "my family is dead"

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Why did the armadillo fall off the cliff?

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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what do you call a half dead black person crawling across your lawn..............................stop laughing and reload

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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A walrus walks into a bar

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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A black man walks up to a bank teller and pulls out a gun, he proceeds to tell the bank teller he saw a white man drop it outside the bank.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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