What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

Hi my name is Burp -you can call me Bu Nice to meet you

whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

9/11.

so a guy walks into the bar...i forget the rest of the jokes but your mother is a whore.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

Ass

Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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