how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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A new restaurant KKKcake

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

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What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

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What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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You wanna hear a JOKE ?!! Justin Bieber has a DlCK !!!

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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