Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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Roses are red Im adopted

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What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you...

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American Idol

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

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Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops