What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

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Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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Adam gives a new view of roid rage

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

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How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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