whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Hillary Clinton

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

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What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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Womens Rights.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

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Knock knock! Why didn't you use the doorbell?

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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