Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

i love to lick...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why were Jews discriminated against for thousands of years? They weren't supposed to. Jews are people just like you and me. And for every ignorant person out there that hates Jews, you better watch your back because God is watching you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

FUCK YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -23

So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is French Fries not a Chinese Food? Answer: Because the Chinese people will get offended.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two planes walk into an office building

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

thumb_up thumb_down -23

*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops