Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats green? The color green.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A lady with no legs walked..... never mind

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down +38

thumbs up!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops