ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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