the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

i am predestal

Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

Black people are innocent.

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Compton

What became of the girl who drank shellac and died? Her poor father attempted CPR for three hours straight before being forced to give up on his child's life. A massive funeral was held; everyone she ever knew attended. It was a very sad affair.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? Pizza doesn't scream when you put it into an oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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