Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to....

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree Because the post man threw a fridge at it

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

hi

A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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