What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

A jew go out of a bar

What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

What is worse than getting the wrong haircut at a hair salon? A terrible shooting at your local Chuck-E-Cheese

taking out the trash... at night

You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

What's city is in New York New York City

What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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