What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

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Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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Guy 1: Hey, did you hear about this blind guy who went bungee jumping off a bridge? Guy 2: No, what happened? Guy 1: He couldn't see Jack!

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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You know what isn't funny? Getting punched in the face. You know what is funny? Brittany Spears getting punched in the face.

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met you

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops