A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

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What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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. pussy . I don't get it ? .of course you don't

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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What has three eyes, scales, seventeen stomachs, and can produce milk? Nothing. Nature has not yet evolved any animal to these specifications.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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