How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

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Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

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Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

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What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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