Why did the Gazelle run away. Because a lion was nearby and as we all know, nature called for the lion to be a carnivore, so the gazelle is in danger of being consumed by the lion.

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Why did the banana rot? Because it didn't have any gills.

rape that shit

Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

To mama so old, she might die soon.

Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...