What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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the meaning of life is too burn calories so I burnt a fat kid?

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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What do you call a gay jewish guy? Heblew.

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Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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Nuneaton..

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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