What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is duke oxtoby? legend.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a black man did not eat chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

thumb_up thumb_down -22

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Once upon a time

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Type 2 diabetics

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops