Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

If an iPad 2 is better than an iPad 1, than what's better than an iPad 2? An iPad 3

2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

Whats very large and produces alot of seamen. The US navy

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

Judge: Why did you hit your wife with a hockey stick, Mr. Johnson? Mr. Johnson: My father and mother were mutually abusive when I grew up. As you may have guessed, this gave me a skewed view of the dynamics between husband and wife, as well as causing me to hide my emotions from myself as a defense mechanism. As a sociopath, I feel no remorse for this occurrence.

Why should you be concerned when you see a mexican riding a bike? because he probably wasnt wearing a helmet

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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