all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

thumb_up thumb_down +2

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

thumb_up thumb_down -13

5 Italian guys from Long Island

thumb_up thumb_down

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

one stop shop

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops