Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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How many fingers do most people have? 10

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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What happens when you mix bath salts, marijiuana, and crack cocaine and proceed to inject it into your body in some manner? You have one of the biggest trips of your life in which it will ware off and you will proceed with your life

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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A boy askes santa for a baby brother. Santa says give me your mom.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

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Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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