why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

Why couldn't the ten year old watch a porno movie? Because it was on blu-ray and his family only owned a regular dvd player.

What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

Canada AYY

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

Freddie Mercurys teeth

A rapist walks into a bar. He is promptly arrested afterwards.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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