If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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hello? knock knock. you called me, why are you saying knock knock?

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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2

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Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

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How do you stop someone from simply copying an already posted anti-joke? No, seriously, how do you?

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hi will

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? its a refridgerator Why did the third monkey jump out of the tree It thought it was a game

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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2 black guys are riding in a car, whos driving? The cops.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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