George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

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roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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A blind man walks into a pole.

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Bannana man do do do do do ect.

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There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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Why didn't Sally eat the meatballs The meatballs ate her

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A narwhall walks into a store and asks the cashier where he keeps the soap products. The cashier does not speak english.

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1st guy:i like anti jokes. 2nd guy:me too, they make me laugh.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

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Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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