Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

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A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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knock knock. who is there ? nobody.you have no friends.

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What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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