Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

knock knock how there me ok come in

How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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