Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops