Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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A man with no legs walks into a bar.

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why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

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What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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Leave her alone...

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:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

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A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

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Why did the little girl's pet bunny pass away? Because her neighbor ripped out it's vitals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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I'm a white rapper bro I do it all the time People don't like me cuz my words don't match

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A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is less Than dinner for two

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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