Pickles

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knock knock come in ok!!!!! ur an elephant oh ya i guess im not suppose to talk!

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

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So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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Tall asians

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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