nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

sky's sty

A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

Tony Soprano walks into a diner

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

Why didn't the woman go to the kitchen? She was kidnapped and forced into sex-slavery

Black people being friendly.

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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