What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

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*knock knock "there's a door bell"

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

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Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

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How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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Doctor, I am afraid of doctors, I dont even dare seek them up. Janitor: Thats quite apparent... Dr.Moral:

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

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Why did the chicken cross the buffet table? To get to the other sides.

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What did one say to the other woman? I have a penis

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A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

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If your scared of paedophiles..... grow up

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

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Why was the little boy sad? Because his dog died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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