Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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A man walks into a bar

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Dislike this, and I kill myself.

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What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

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Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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Sarah Palin

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Don't hate the cosplayer hate the... Actually, I lied, hate the cosplayer.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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