a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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Knock Kock Who's there Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley is a fictional character in the novel To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Don't cry.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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Fart

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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Her lips are not proportionally fit to her face.

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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What did the catholic priest say at the AA meeting? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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