Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your mother is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black man comes home from work.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A wife asks her husband to treat her like she's special. So he tells her, "Gooooooooooo... Maaaaaaaaaaaaake... Meeeeeeee.... Aaaaaa.... Saaaaaaaandwitch

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops