My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

Yock

What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

A jew go out of a bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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