What Is somthing that is 5 "5" and white A 5 "5" white person

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you get a chicken to cross the road? Get him in the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

rarw

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -4

rarw

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops