What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off and his body was never recovered. Repeat then handled the funeral planning.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Customer: "I can't turn my computer on." Phone support: "Do you have power?" Customer: "Yes." Phone support: "Do you have fingers?" Customer: "No."

A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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