Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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