You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he f**king felt like it!

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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