Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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How many dead babies can you fit in a mini? It is variable according to the size of each baby.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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