A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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Give to the less fortunate. Date ugly people

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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A White guy, Black guy and Hispanic are all on the same bus. They get off at their predetermined stops and continue their day.

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

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Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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