What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

Justin's life

A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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