Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Q: What do the French call a quarter pounder with cheese? A: Le Royale with cheese

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Hey, you know what sucks about being blind? You can see.

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What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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i'm not gay

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pancakes Ouch! That hurt!

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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