Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Penis.

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gun store to buy a gun. After years of abuse and mockery, he was tired of being called "chicken", and was going to shoot up the entire school

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Worms don't like apples.

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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I am a nigger.

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Q: What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit

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What do you call an African American witch doctor dressed in ceremonial robes flying a plane? A Pilot.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops