Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

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Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

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your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops