HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

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GONNA

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops