Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -61

whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down -97

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What is the difference between a horny college girls and a horny high school girl? A: Usually, an age will seperate people in different grades. Also, what grade their in.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Girls got to Jupiter to get more stupider. Boys go to Mars to build a sophisticated civilization.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

thumb_up thumb_down

a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

thumb_up thumb_down -85

hello

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Life

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock, knock. Who's there? You. You who? You should be drug out into the street and shot. Whoever you are, I will find you.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's black and blue and red all over? nothing, you're and idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops