What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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I'm HIV positive.

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A man sat down Then he stood up

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A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Pull my finger ouch..

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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Knock knock Who's there? Osama Bin Laden

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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what do u call a apple a apple

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What's the difference between a white baby and a black baby? 10 minutes in the microwave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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