Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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Q.why was ireland takin over by the brits A.they wanted it

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari. There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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AFTER PONDERING UPON YOUR SUGGESTION... I HAVE CONSIDERED, THOUGHT, SOUGHT TROUGH THE YELLOW PAGES OF WISDOM AND MIGHT, AND MY ANSWER TO THAT SUGGESTION IS... A DEFINITIVE, FIRM AND MANLY... Moral: MAAAAYBEEEEE?!?!?

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There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

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What is 8 times 4? 32

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Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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