why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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I hate long jokes -_-

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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penis

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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A man walks into a bar The bar now has a hole in it.

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

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two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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newt gingrich

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Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

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I agree

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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