SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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A black man walks out of a police station

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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Frogs with dislocated fingers....................................................CARROT

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Did you know that a hamster and a cigarette are almost the same? How? Because they are both completely harmless until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

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A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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