How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

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what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

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A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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Did you just fall from heaven? If not I'm gonna beat the shit out of you

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Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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Anagram.

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

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What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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