So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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someone called a frog a frog

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? She was a woman.

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What did the chicken say to the butcher? Moo.

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Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

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Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I don't know what to do! One day I'm a wig wam, the other day I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee again!" The doctor sighs and replies,"Sir, we've been over this. You have stage four periodic cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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