What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

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what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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Whats worse then 10 black men hanging from trees? Kittens

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2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

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It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

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If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

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a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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