Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

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A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

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What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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Lebron Traveled

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What's easier to get than a broke prostitute on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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A man walks into a bar He is now in the emergency room suffering from deep lacerations to the forehead as well as a bloody nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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