what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

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What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

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"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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Girls

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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A blond went to a barber to get her hair cut. She had her ear phones in and tolled the barber not to take her ear phones out at all. So the barber was swiching her ear phones to cut her hair then she fell asleep so the barber took both of her ear phones off for a minute and then she died

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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