Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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whats funny about about adailia rose?nothing shes just fucked up in every way shape and form. but 100% defenatly stick my cock in her shitter

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Why did the gay man die? He had AIDS

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Why did the man walk into the bar? To purchase alcoholic beverages ready for consumption.

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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