How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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Top Gear USA

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What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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This is an anti joke

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A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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knock knock. who's there? ya ya who? dot com

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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whats white and sticky glue

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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