What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter what you call him. He won't come.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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who is mark

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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