You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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A van drives into a car.

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Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty jumped off and committed suicide.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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What's just not right? Left

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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