Which is longer? A rope...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Non-Anti-Joke.com!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

thumb_up thumb_down +34

why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

KARL KARASHIAN - FACEBOOK

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are blue cover me im goin in

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops