What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Why did Rebecca Black die? She killed herself due to the cruelty of many people

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

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Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

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Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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What begins with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Your neighbor

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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Racial equality.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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