Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

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I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Docter. Docter who? XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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why did the mushroom go to the party? because he`s a fungi

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What made the lady dance? Bandz!

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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Internet Explorer

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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