Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

A Great White Shark eats a baby seal's mother. Great White Sharks don't feel remorse.

Guy: "Did you hear about the guy who cried wolf?" Friend: "Yes. He was pulling your leg. People cry tears not wolves." Guy: "How did you know he was pulling my leg?" Friend: "If you look down, he's still there pulling it."

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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