The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Andy Carrol

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red.. Your child is also red.. I drove my car over his face. <3

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I HATE G-SPOT AND BTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops