Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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13

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Women

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Whats better than winning a gold in the special olympics? Not being a retard

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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What do you call a man with no legs and arms hanging on your wall? Art

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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why did the child go to hospital with 52 broken bones,lung and kidney failure,heart disease and cut off penis. because his mum threw a fridge at mikeanator_27

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Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

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What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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