YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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A black man, a Jewish man, and an Indian man are all in the taxi when they were all killed in a car crash. Who was driving the car? The taxi driver.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

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What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

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What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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