why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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A boy orders a sandwich at a restaurant. He then questions the cashier about it. Boy: Excuse me, Why is my sandwich so bad? Cashier: Sorry, none of our women cooks were in today.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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Why was Jimmy upset? There is a frog taped to his face.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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What has four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a daycare.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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What is white and black and red all over.

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roses are red i have a phone nobody texts me forever alonee lol

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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