How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

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What did the DJ play at the disco? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill? Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out It seeps out, it seeps out Face down, home town looks so grey Looks so grey, looks so grey Convexed you bend, twist and shout Twist and shout, twist and shout Stand up brush off get moving Get moving, get moving What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) Face down, home town, face down, home town Face down, home town, it looks so grey (x4) What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/monster_lyrics_automatic_the.html All about Automatic The: http://www.musictory.com/music/Automatic+The

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 killed 9.

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being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

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What do you call a girl with 2 brains? Pregnant

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

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Women's rights.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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What happens when you step on Jupiter? You cannot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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