Q: What has eyes but can't see, has arms but no hands and legs but no feet A: a blind man with his hands and feet amputated with cancer

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

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Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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What's red and smells like cherries Cherries

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Why was the man so hungry? Because he hadn't eaten in days.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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Why did the fish fly It didn't

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A man stand's on a chair Then he fall's off

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Why was the black racist guy and the white racist guy, who 0hated each other, afraid of Michael Jackson? They didn't want to be the other each others color.

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What do u call a black man in the middle of a crowd of white men? A rare sighting of a black man trying to go to colledge.

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what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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