What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Q: Whats worse than a dead baby in a bag? A: Please just make my hamburger.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ?

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A women's opinion.

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which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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An English man walks into a pub.

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

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there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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