how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

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An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

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What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

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Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

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What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

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how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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