Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

1,2,3,4,5... 6.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

i dislike sack in my mouth

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

Poop

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

an dislexik nam rwote hits

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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