How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

hit the thumbs down button

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

Whats more fun than swinging a baby around on a clothesline at 200 miles per hour ? Stopping it with a shovel

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Many people protest. they go home after a few hours

ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally had a burning hatred for dairy products.

I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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