*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

An Irishman, Scotsman and Englishman were jumping into well because they were told whatever they shouted when they fell they landed on. I lied and they died, hehe

Why did the weird, creepy old man in the beat up van give ice cream to the little girl? Because his company went bankrupt and as part of a court order, he was thereby forced to give away the remaining contents of his inventory to those who seeked it.

Why did Gary's cat fall from the tree? He didn't use enough gaffa tape.

Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

The.

whats the difference between a black man and a terd ? one is a black man the other is a terd

2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

The Earth is a nice place to live.

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

Your mother is so stupid that she was tested and proved to be mentally retarded.

Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...