why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? get in the car

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

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47

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Chuck Norris Dies.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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